Give thanks for ingratitude! That glorious confirmation of every stereotype and prejudice ever nursed in the deepest corners of the ungrateful soul….

Brian said, and I was amazed. Brian Trainis he was called then. He said, when you do things for people expect nothing back!

Oh, I said, of course! Because there will be payback when you really need it, right? Calling in favours…I said this because Brian was CFO of this thrusting little company I was working for. Known for his sharp practices, his ruthlessness in dealing with suppliers and customers alike. Ethically, a DarkSpace.

No, he said. I meant it when I said expect nothing back. Ask for nothing back. Never call in favours!

But, I said.

But nothing, he said.

He was, despite his ruthless reputation, something of a mentor and a guru for me. I felt that he let me see into his soul and inside there was a sweet, good little boy who just wanted to be liked. Which was the reason he screwed customers, suppliers and staff…he just wanted the boss to like him.

I said he was Brian Trainis but now he isn’t because he killed himself a few years ago. His girl friend apparently said she didn’t like him anymore. Ungrateful shit.

I followed his advice for years and I still do, and it’s incredibly liberating, expecting nothing back. Because if you do, well it’s such a bloody surprise! I mean, people give you awards – I have shelves of the things and I have no idea why. Not to mention “likes” on Facebook! The negative is the embarrassment which people think is false modesty, which it may be….