The CABINET hath been RESHUFFLE!

In their crystal maze of glass and brass

The ruling class sit on our ass

And giggling make their silly rules

For proles and other silly fools

To carp and caw in rank dismay

As all their ownings are taken away

‘Oh bliss!’ they cry, ‘How joy it be

To water the Westminstertree!’

And joy-consumed the one percent

(Charging us a silly rent)

And farting methane and carbon and stuff

(well too much, dears, is NEVER enough!)

And unzipped they plash  the tree with pee

The spreading roots of the Westminstertree!

Above on his nest the BORIS sits

Upon his eggs and picks his nits

While at his feet the sloven GOVE

Doth pose and flurry in jacket mauve

With hip-hop hussle he sways his hips

And blows him kisses through painted lips

His dagger hid inside his cloak

The Govester giggles at his jokes

And snidely pouts, quite off his head

On DDT and Cannabis bread

‘Oh Boris! Dear’ he ecstatic cries

‘You’re the cleverest one! – do up your lies –

Tis time your true blue flag unfurled –

BORIS is King of the whole fucking world!’

Below him on branches all insecure

The Tory Bluds are counting the score

The Williamson and his Black Widow spider

The Jenrick with his Planning Insider

The Raab, whose bleats defy

The sea and its waves, the glowering sky

The Priti who, ugly as sin

Leaves all her gees in the grammatical bin

And plowing her way though Channel’s squalls

Builds out of ocean, Britain’s walls

And there sits the Richi, Rishi Rich

Who singing softly ‘Well life is a bitch

When you ain’t got no money. Tee tee!

At last Great Britain ain’t as wealthy as me!

Now BORIS looking down decries

His useless team, that so defies

The cause of truth and justice grim

As all the Cab defers to him

‘Alack!’ quoth he, My ministery

Doth weigh me down the Westminstertree

And those that hath upclimbed and clawed

Hath reached too high – God I’m bored!’

And taking up his wooden saw

Our Boris doth the branches gnaw

And one by one they tumble down

Crying, ‘You shit you berk you malicious clown!

‘Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh you wait until I get my trews

And  rumble thee on GB News!’

And soon the newbies are installed

In serried ranks some very bald

The GOVESTER farts in upper glee

As climbing up the Westminstertree

‘Oh Boris dear!’ He doth proclaim

“You Level me Up! Thou mighty brain!’

(His dagger held inside his cloak

He’ll keep for now. What a bloke!)

All Trussed up, good queen Liz

Wonders where ‘Abroad’ is

And can she send the Snowflakes there?

And get the Wokes – out of her hair?

Sajid at least a clean pair of hands

Quite mask-free he quite glibly stands

And by the past’s indication

Will put the backbench ahead of the nation!

Alok, alas, is still in post

To Cop 26 while the world doth roast

Quoth ‘We’ll wave a wand, you will see

How magically and sound

We still get coal from the ground

And oil from the sea

Thanks to me

And Boris the King!

Trust us to save

The whole fucking thing!’

The rest is such an awful shower

A nest of vipers with too much power

I can’t be bothered to write some more. Enough to say

If ONLY they would go away!

As clucking with delight as dim

As Boris’ might, they worship him

‘Oh King behold the world defies

The Westminstertree reaches up!

To the skies!

And never mind the Proles sad moans 

As Covid seeps into their bones

And there’s nothing left in Sainsbury

Under the spreading Westminstertree!